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I wish I could love super metroid. I really do. The game holds up. The graphics are great, the sound design is bafflingly superb for a 16 bit game. Controls are tight. Map size is big but not daunting.
And then you get to the part where you fall down a pitt. And the game teaches you to wall jump.
…everytime I play the game, thats where the game ends. It’s been 30+ years, and I still can’t wall jump in that game.
Right??? Grab your NES cartridge, and make sure to grab the one that you borrowed from your friend last week. Throw them in your bookbag, and pedal your bike while your mom has no real way of knowing where you are. Sure you SAY you’re going to Jimmys house, but it’s not like you have a GPS tracker. And even if you did, how would your mom follow that that tracker? Go to the FBI and use their super computers??? Maybe you’d like her to ask for the nuke launch codes while she’s there. Just be back home before the street lights come on, or dad’s beating your ass!
Ah, the 80s. What a magical time. A magical time of AIDS epidemics, wars on drugs causes by and fought by the government, toxic toys not being recalled, and everybody being too dumb to care.
Nowadays, kids don’t even HAVE bikes! You throw your kids into a strangers car, call it uber, and use technology the 1980s government would have dreamed of having to make sure your kid goes to that little shit Jimmys house.
Everytime I remember the world I grew up in, and then look around at the world I’m in, I feel like I’m missing a big piece of what happened. These two worlds don’t line up. Like when I see old photos of my dad, from the 60s, I say “Yep, that sure looks like what my dad would look like if he were young”. But when I look at the 80s, I think “that sure seems like a totally unrelated society. One in which absolutely did NOT age into this world…”
I don’t understand life.
Don’t forget the part where those physical games mean nothing. Requiring day 1 patches. Meaning, the day those sony servers die, the day after if you’ve never played that game before? The disc does nothing. It just points to a download, on server, which in this scenario is offline.
Meanwhile, you can still play a ps2 game, on ps2 hardware, and always will be able to. Hell sony could cease to exist, and you can still play GTA Vice City on PS2 50 years from now.
I know PS3s online services have gone offline, but I wonder if this trend of “here’s a disc, it requires a download” started on the ps3, or the ps4.
I wonder if I could still buy a disc, and play the game tomorrow.
So you bought a real physical pizza at pizza hut. Printed on every box at the time was a code. You went to pizza huts website, put in the code, and the page allowed you to download a file. When double clicked, the file modified your sims installation.
So now when you played the sims, before your sim could order a pizza for $40. But now there was another option. “Order the Bigfoot from Pizza Hut.” Which cost $19.99 + sims tax $0.01"
The sims tax was because in real life the BigFoot was $19.99, and they wanted to advertise this, but the game wasn’t programmed to handle decimals in sims 1 money.
Then when your pizza was delivered, it had the same properties as the regular pizza to your sims hunger. But the box was a rectangular box, and made to look like the real thing, which was rectagular box with square slices. The pizza delivery guy was wearing a pizza hut uniform.
And if your sim holds a $40 pizza, the slices are triangle. If they hold a bigfoot pizza slice, they were square.
And the other difference was the $40 pizza, your driver took like 20 seconds to arrive (which was like 40 minutes in game time). A pizza hut driver showed up instantly (which still meant like 10 minutes in game time).
Now here’s the coolest part. The Bigfoot pizza was created by pizza huts senior director of marketing. But you know him better by name as Reggie Fils-Aimé.
I can’t find any evidence that Reggie also was reaponsible for the sims content…but…come on. He created the BigFoot pizza. This content was just marketing for the BigFoot. It’s Reggie. Hkw is this NOT his idea, right?
Yeah, because we were all doing mentally fantastic when Animal Crossing New Horizons launched. Remind me again, when was that again? Oh right. Just in the heart of 2020 pandemic quarantine when everybody was losing their shit, and storming state capitol buildings trying to force the government to reopen businesses, and doing pushups outside gyms as cops killed black men and triggered riots across the country.
Great days for mental health.
I love Nintendo games. I HATE the company behind the games. And it’s not like this is recent shit either. This goes all the way back to the 80s. They tried sueing Blockbuster for including game manuals with their rentals.
So if you remember blockbuster printing the important bits of the manual, like controls, on the plastic dust cover, that was their workaround to “including copyrighted documents”.
And the only reason they sued for copyright infringement was because they tried to sue to end rentals completely, but blockbuster wasn’t breaking any laws. So Nintendo tried doing whag cops do, and bust you for something smaller, just to get you into court. Then try’d try to wear you down with lawsuits by showing you had a history of law breaking.
Problem was, Nintendo just got a history of suing anyone and anything.
Alternate timeline there’s a version of Nintendo who never sued anyone, but won THIS lawsuit, because they didn’t have that history of wasting the courts time for decades.
I’m not saying I will eat this double cheeseburger…but I might.
Pay no attention to my hungry stomach, or my staring gaze at this delicious double cheeseburger with just the perfect balance of meat to cheese ratio. Melting in almost a gooey waterfall down the sides of these patties. With just a hint of ketchup at the top, and topped with lettuce to give it a crunch.
I’m not saying if I will eat this double cheeseburger…but I might.
The problem with monopoly is that it fits your description…BUT!!! nobody actually plays it the right way. House rules are so ingrained into monopoly culture, that I’ve incorporated my own house rule. Anyone who puts money under free parking gets stabbed with a knife. When they tell me that’s not in the rules, I tell them to show me where money under free parking is in the rules. There’s so many of these house rules that people legitimately think are in the rulebook. They aren’t. So if you want to put money under free parking, I want to stab your hand with a knife. House rules and all.
One time I was playing monopoly with my mom. She had 53 dollars, and landed on boardwalk. It was unowned. I yhen said "I bid $54. She said “you can’t do that…”. I showed her in the rule book where I could, and she got angry at me.
So, the problem with monopoly is that most people assume they know how to play, and also assume they know the best stratagies. They don’t.
The best stratagy is actually to buy 1 of each property that can have houses built on them. Prioritizing the low cost properties first. Make THEM buy 2 of each, thinking they’ll get the monopoly, thinking they’ll get a trade. Then drain them further with the railroads and utilities. Eventually they’ll run out of money. Just NEVER trade them a property that would allow a path to them getting a monopoly.
Of coarse, all of that is easier said than done. That’s what makes it a game. But it all falls apart if people aren’t playing the same game.
I played it back in the 90s when it came out. What surprised me almost immediately was the ren fair scene. I forget exactly how they worded it, but the guards had kept track of everything I did at the fair. Which was mind blowing to me in a time when all games npcs would literally unload when off screen, and reload when onscreen. Completely forgetting anything you’d previously said/done.
Then THIS game remembers what I did 30 minutes ago.
Was that still startling in 2020, or did you not even realize how mind blowing that was since you’re in 2020 and not 1996?
My eyes read “pearl jam”. My brain read “pearl jam”. But my memory of what “pearl jam” was, deleted “pearl jam” and inserted “space jam”.
So even though I was reading and thinking pearl jam, I was also remembering that pearl jam is a 1990s half live action, half cartoon movie starring the looney toons and micheal jordan in an attempt to play basketball better than some aliens for some reason.
That’s pearl jam, alright?
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This would be AMAZING advertising campaign. Create fully completed game. Cancel that “almost finished” game. Developers take 2 month paid break with their only job being to seem like they’re out of work, and willing to do interviews with the press about the game. Then, hype up the game, talk shit about your employers, tell the media your employers made a huge mistake canceling that game. Readers get mad that this game got TAKEN AWAY from them. Company sees public outcry, and so they…release the game. Sales skyrocket.
Meanwhile all you really did was give your talented staff a break, and boosted your reputation with them about feeling valued. Used the media as free advertising, and made record profits while making the public feel that their outcry was heard. Thus improving your relationship with the customers.
OR AM I OVERTHINKING THIS???